The road to healing…

….was not easy. After spending years of ignoring the pain, often pretending like it wasn’t there, I finally took steps to find healing. It was one of the hardest steps I’ve taken, but it was also my first real step toward self care. I spent many nights crying myself to sleep and crying with my healing group. I’m thankful for their support and encouragement, as well as their constant desire to point me toward Christ.

There are some people who think that I still need healing. But that’s only because they have not spent enough time with me to really know what I have been through and how much time and energy I have put into my healing process. Last week I got closure. Not that I was looking for it, but it came as a blessing and release. Being able to share my feelings about why I walked away, why I said no more to the unhealthy relationship gave me peace and hopefully the person I walked away from clarity, and just maybe it gave them a willingness to move forward in their own healing process.

It’s interesting to hear other people say it’s too soon to move on. Has anyone ever told you that? To that I say, according to who’s standard? Yours? The universal standard? Moving on is different for every person, and no person has the right to judge someone else’s path to healing and restoration.

Sometimes you walk away because you realize you’ve become just as unhealthy as the person hurting you, and the only way to save yourself and your sanity is to walk away.

Often times, healing requires extraction, an amputation if you will. It’s like pruning a tree, sometimes you have to cut off the unhealthy branches to let the healthy ones grow and flourish.

If you find yourself in an unhealthy relationship, but don’t have the courage to walk away on your own, find safe people to share your journey with. And not everyone, even those you love, is safe. Safe people listen, don’t offer advice, and definitely don’t judge you. They sit with you in your pain, grieve and empathize with you. Instead of telling you to not cry, or it will be alright, or even what they think you “should” do, they do the better thing. They cry with you and remind you that you’re not alone. They ask good questions so you come to your own conclusions instead of the conclusion they think you should come to. They teach you that forgiveness after grief is the first step to healing. And they remind you that forgiveness doesn’t let the person who hurt you off the hook; it means freedom and healing for you. Most important, they definitely don’t share your private conversations with other people, even in the “pray for so and so because…”, which is really just gossip.

Then, when you are ready to celebrate your healing, your steps to moving forward, those safe people are the first to celebrate with you because they know the intense pain you’ve endured. They know there is blessing and love on the other side of healing. They stick with you every step of the way, cheering you on, praying for you as you walk your own path, even when it’s not the path they chose for themselves, because each persons healing looks different.

If you find yourself in a place to share someone else’s pain, can you honestly say you’re a safe person for them? Aside from love, it’s the greatest blessing you can give a friend, safety. I hope you never have to experience what I went through, but if you do, I hope you have a healing group of safe people around you. And as Lysa Terkhurst says, “you’re heart is much too beautiful a place for unhealed pain.”

So thank you to my healing group. You listened and you patiently watched me walk my long road to healing. You were with me every step of the way, and I would not have had the strength to do it without you. I am brave because of you. While I thought it would never be possible, you all were the first to celebrate with me when love found it’s way to my door again.

Way Maker

Almost every morning I’ve been waking up with a praise song on my mind. Sometimes it’s the same one two days in a row, and other times, like today, it was a new song. I started singing “Way Maker. As the words began to form in my mind, I was reminded of God’s faithfulness. He is the Way Maker, Miracle Worker, Promise Keeper, Light in the darkness and He is working even when I don’t see it.

In the midst of these uncertain times and the personal struggles I’m facing, I am thankful that He is not surprised by what’s happening. He has a plan for each of us and His love and provision do not depend on our economy or even how long we have to “shelter in”. As a people person, this time at home is bordering on crazy making, but it has also been refreshment to my soul. Instead of asking “why me”, God is prompting me to ask Him what He’s trying to teach me about myself and about what’s in my heart during this time.

The days have begun to run together, and the date eludes me until I pull out my calendar (yes, I still use a paper calendar). Today it dawned on me that tomorrow is Good Friday. The day we remember Christ’s death on the cross to save us from our sins. I am in awe of how God sent His only Son to die for you and for me. He made a perfect world, then sin came to destroy that world, BUT Jesus came to restore and heal it. His salvation is a free gift, not to be earned, as there is nothing we could ever do to be good enough. All we have to do is say yes to the Way Maker, Miracle Worker, Promise Keeper, Light in the darkness, for Him to heal our brokenness and mend our hearts.

Will you say yes today? And if you’ve already said yes, what is God teaching you in this moment? How will you share His love with others today? For me, it’s taking a big leap to be vulnerable enough to share what I believe with others, not worrying about what someone might think of me, because honestly, it’s not about me. Want to talk? Feel free to reach out. I’ve got time.

 

Resilient

Had you been with me the day I was painting this, you would have said it was a great descriptor if my mood. Sometimes I paint to work through my emotions and that day was no different. And yet, as I painted, it took on another form and ended up looking like the burnt forest we walked through the day before.
Redwoods are resilient. They keep standing strong in spite of the fires that leapt more than 30 feet the year before. It’s as if the fires strengthened their resolve to keep growing.

I want to be like those trees…stronger in spite of the difficulties of life. God is using those trees to remind me He is here to strengthen me. He is here lovingly surrounding me and protecting me. He is my strength. 
What about you? Where do you find your strength when life gets tough and is out of your control?

May this painting point you to our real strength…God. “When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you. For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭43:2-3‬a NLT‬‬

Shameless Selfie

It’s been almost 6 months since the day everything changed forever…her accident. It seems like we are measuring life from that day, March 9th, on now. One moment, you’re thinking about the usual list of things you have to do, and then suddenly it all comes crashing down around you. For me now, it seems so surreal, but for her it’s a daily reality. 

It hurts my heart knowing Sarah suffered such injury that day…compound fracture of her right arm, extensive road rash on her legs, arm, and face, a collapsed lung, blurred/double vision, and a concussion. I will be forever grateful for her boyfriend Matt who, by the power of God, resuscitated her, bringing her back to life. 
The original picture was taken by her…a shameless selfie, almost 2 months after her accident. She had decided to put on some makeup herself, which is hard to do with your left hand when you are right-handed. Even though she is beautiful without makeup, it was nice to see a glimmer of hope within her. 
Today, Sarah is a true miracle. God grew my faith through all of it, and I’m reminded of the verse in Pilippians which says, “being confident of this (our faith), that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” He has a plan for each of us, and I can’t wait to see what He has planned for Sarah. He went to great lengths to save her and heal her. Sarah, like each of us, is God’s masterpiece, created anew in Christ Jesus to do the good things He planned for her long ago.
She has come such a long way, and has presevered through so much. She’s been back to working full time for a few months now, since she no longer needs daily assistance. Her arm is almost healed, and now she only has to go to PT once a week to gain back full movement of it. Her sight is clear, and the scars are slowly healing. So many things to be thankful for, and it’s times like this that a shameless selfie is not only acceptable, it’s perfect.

When did he get so tall?

“All Grown Up” Day 2 of 30 paintings in 30 days.

It’s hard to believe our son Liam is now 16 years old. How did he grow up so fast? And now he’s taller than me!

This year he got braces so now when he smiles, he won’t show his teeth, making him look so serious…the glasses help that too. This painting was inspired by a picture of Liam on GQ day at school. He was all dressed up with his sports jacket and bow tie…very handsome! They got their school pictures taken that day as well, so I look forward to seeing how they turned out.

Not sure why it’s taken me so long to paint portraits…its been fun.

The Challenge has begun!

It’s hard to believe it’s already September 1, 2016. Where has the time gone? Time is flying by and I’ve realized I need to be diligent and purposeful with my time…especially my downtime. And since our tv in the family room is broken, it’s forced me to do other things rather than watch tv. Y’all have to know if I start watching tv, it’s hard to stop. So many days, it’s just better for me not to even turn it on. And honestly, how is it better watching someone else live their life than actually living your own?

Now that it’s September, I’m excited to begin a new project, granted I was so filled with ideas on Monday that I secretly started and painted the first 6! Really there are no rules to when you paint as long as you paint 30 paintings in the next 30 days. The whole point is to practice, or like many artists like to call it “doing it for the process”. I like to chose a theme so it’s easier to keep things going. Sadly, in the past I haven’t always been able to finish, but in the end, I love the paintings I’ve created over the 30 days.

This time I’m stepping outside my box. My comfort zone is typically florals…but this year I’ve been working on abstracts, some more so than others. It’s been a great way to challenge myself and let go of my perfectionism. Maybe you’ve seen some of my abstract boats on my Facebook page – Wendy mitchell – artist. If you haven’t, please go check them out. They’re fun! And now, I’m going back to one of my first loves in art…portraits. Most of the portraits I have done have been in pencil, pastel or charcoal…one day I’ll dig those out of my high school art portfolio and show you. 😀 In the last 6 years, I put portraiture aside to pursue other things, and now the excitement is just bubbling over, because this time I’m painting them. And even better, they will be abstract…or as much as my perfectionist self will let them be! 

So here’s my first abstract portrait. This one is called “Gigi 1.0”. The original picture I modeled it after is of her (our daughter) laughing. I LOVE when she laughs. Her laughter lights up a room.  I hope you enjoy this series as much as I have had painting it! Stayed tuned for tomorrow’s painting of Liam.

#13 of 30…Founders Hall

Built in the early 1870’s, this home was owned by Roswell’s first veterinarian.

It is now used as a special events facility

#12 of 30 Roswell Mill

Fully operative in 1839, Roswell Mill was the first of its kind in Roswell. This mill became the leading manufacturer of materials used for the Confederacy.

The current building known as the mill was built in 1882.

#11 of 30…Naylor Hall

Built in 1840 by Barrington King for his bookkeeper, Mr. Proudfoot and his wife. The original home was small and quite damaged during the Civil War. Proudfoot began to rebuild after the occupation. He also lived in the home until he died in 1870.

The columns were added much later by Colonel Harrison Broadwell in the 1930’s. He also named the home Naylor Hall in honor of his wife’s family.

#10 of the 30 day challenge…Kimball Hall

I finally had time to sit down and paint again! This home is so pretty. Right in the heart of Roswell, it was built in the 1880’s by John Kimball for his daughters Sallie & Suzie. They opened up their private residence as a boarding house, offering newcomers to Roswell a place to live. It operated as a boarding house for over 100 years. It is now a special events facility.